Brothership and The Only Child


You can not choose the family you are born into. You CAN choose, or be lucky enough, to be surrounded by people who really do care about you, who become the family you want and need. The friends who are more than just friends. I have been lucky to have a number of people in my life who have stuck by me, supported me, care about me, through all that I’ve gone through, good and bad. Most of them have been alongside me since High School or the first years of College. The few others I’ve met and bonded with along the way. They have been true family, in so many ways, and I’m blessed to know them and be part of their lives as they are in mine.

I’m an only child.

Let me tell you about my brother.

Sam & I became friends on July 5th, 1973. We went to the same High School, had a math class together, and that was that. Through a series of events, we wound up meeting when walking to summer school and started talking. By the time we had gotten to school, I had asked Sam if he wanted to join me at a Planet of the Apes movie marathon at a local theater. He said yes: we met at the movie house, spent over nine hours in a pretty packed movie theater. This began a friendship that has lasted close to 40 years now.

We’ve had our adventures, times we’ve just been plain silly, laughed a lot, a few times we’ve been pissed at each other, but with more times of caring about each other.  He is privy to my thoughts, my hopes and dreams. We’ve remained close, even though he is not close in proximity. I could tell you about our stories: how we drove all night to Massachusetts to find a girl I was mooning over, only to chicken out and drive back home (in the same night); our Sangria & Pretzel “In Concert” evenings; Godspell and his meeting his future wife; double dates; adventures in father-hood; long phone calls, both good and bad; moving escapades; movies and meals and concerts and long, long walks around Westchester & NYC; everything that goes into 40 years of friendship.

Yesterday, out of the blue, he and his wife Barbara did something extremely generous out of the goodness of their hearts. It was unexpected, and  it is greatly appreciated.

Thank you, Sam & Barbara.

This, in no way, is a slight to those others who have been in my life almost as long. I’ve had the honor of having the close friends of Rich, Kim, Norma, Laura (and, sadly, Charles, who is missed) almost as long as Sam. They, and others, have made the journey I’ve been on worthwhile.

Here is to friends, who are your brothers and sisters. I love mine, with all I have to give.



About StuHN

I am a creative individual with many areas of passion: Professional Storyteller; NYS Certified Drama Specialist/Educator; Professional Development Coordinator & Facilitator; Workshop Leader; sometime Puppeteer; Playwright; Director; Performer; Teaching Artist; and sometimes more.

Posted on April 6, 2013, in Caring, counseling, Family, Friends, Healing, Inspiration, Love, Mindfulness, Support, Transformation and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.

  1. The Tundra Two-Stepper

    You are very lucky to have such a friendship as this, Stu. Cherish it always, as it seems that you do.

  2. My little sister and I have always been very close and have seen one another through several rough spots in our lives.

    I met Mike on a BBS (before the Internet was public) and he became my “twin brother by another mother.” Unfortunately we have only lived in the same state for a couple of those many years. But we talk daily and have been bestest friends for a long, long time – and much closer than my natural brother and I ever were.

  3. Friends are to be cherished

  4. Some friends become family, indeed! You are so blessed, Stuart, to have Sam and Barbara in you life. Thanks for reminding us all of the power and endurance of true friendship.

  5. I know I’m lucky to have a wonderful sister and family who live close by. I’m glad you have such great friends who have kept in touch and are always willing to help you out (and each other) when needed.

  6. Thank you Bro! This is very touching! I love you and I’m here for you!

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