Posted by StuHN
In seeing one of the people I am using as part of my support, I was told that I have “amazing coping skills.” This has sat with me since yesterday, rolling around in my mind, trying to get into the compliment. This has been part of my nature lately: not truly taking in the compliments others have bestowed upon me in my effort to feeling better. I’m not deliberately blocking them consciously. I do understand that the emotional turmoil I’ve faced and am still tackling can easily get in the way.
Yesterday I wrote about feeling, at times in my life, like an utter failure. I’ve failed AT things or WITH people, and that is part of life, I get that. I’ve also had a number of positive things, successes that have sustained me. What is the measure of success? I never really needed, nor wanted, my name in lights or be “the next big thing.” There are many, many small successes that are infinitely satisfying. I’ve experienced them.
I want to experience more of the same, and be able to cope with the things that don’t happen, or don’t end up the way I wish they would.
The biggest coping skill I can share, and I have done so on numerous times here, is to really appreciate and hold onto the friends and loved ones who support me in so many ways. The majority of these are not blood relatives, but the ones I hold dear. As I’ve mentioned in the past, there are those who I know face-to-face, and there are those who have reached out across the internet with their support and caring. Many who I do know on a more personal basis I rarely, if ever, hear from them. Same with family members. I do not wish them ill or harbor any anger, but it is sad, in a way, but…it is what it is. I do know that if they were in need, I’d do the best I could, if I could, to help them. It shouldn’t be about what you get in return. It’s how I am, what makes me, me.
One internet supporter, Bonnie Copeland, writes on her blog My Rivendell: Your Fabulous Living Coach. Her post today, “Strength? Perhaps it’s not what you think” is worth reading. I agree with it, and trying to live to those principles is part of what I know has been inside me, and I hope to keep striving to make myself find more of my inner strength, part of my coping skills.
What are your coping skills?
“All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsion, habit, reason, passion, and desire.
It is possible to fail in many ways…while to succeed is possible only in one way.
In poverty and other misfortunes of life, true friends are a sure refuge. The young they keep out of mischief; to the old they are an aid and a comfort in their weakness, and those in the prime of life they incite to noble deeds.
You will never do anything in this world without courage. It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.
We are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act but a habit.” ~Aristotle
About StuHNI am a creative individual with many areas of passion: Professional Storyteller; NYS Certified Drama Specialist/Educator; Professional Development Coordinator & Facilitator; Workshop Leader; sometime Puppeteer; Playwright; Director; Performer; Teaching Artist; and sometimes more.
Posted on February 5, 2013, in Caring, counseling, Despair, Family, Friends, Grief, Healing, Inspiration, Love, Mindfulness, Support, Therapy, Transformation and tagged being in the moment, Bonnie Copeland, bravery, caring, compassion, concern, coping, Coping skills, counseling, depression, Fear, focus, giving thanks, God, hope, life coach, love, mental health, My R, My Rivendell, patience, rededication, strength, Talking to God, trying. Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.