The New Year…and a blog award
We all place so much importance on the beginning of the new year…well, we place importance on a lot of dates and things: if we took all the good wishes, hopes & aspirations, love, resolutions, etc., and applied them every day, not just at the “designated” times, I do feel we’d all be better off. I love my SO whether it is Valentines Day or not. I want to be healthier year round, not just as a New Years resolution. I want there to be peace on earth and good will to everyone all the time, not just a month of the year.
I do hope that this coming time is a better one, not just for myself but for those who I know who are hurting, one way or the other. For those I don’t personally know, but read about/hear about/have no clue about as well: Is it an impossible hope to have, with such a large canvas? Most likely, but those thoughts are in me that good things can and will happen.
The last third of 2012 was so bleak for me, in so many ways, and I’m only now starting, again, to see all the many positives I do have in my life, even with the loss I’ve suffered. Still quite a road to go, but, as I’ve written before, if I do nothing but wallow in the misery and not put it into perspective, gain personal strength for those around me and especially for myself, then I’m not doing anyone any good. If we’re not here for doing some good, then why are we here? I need to find some joy again in living for myself first so it can extend to those around me.
I rarely talk about losing my mother here, even though that was the event that brought me down to the ground and to creating this blog. She and I (as my father and I) had a complicated, often combative, relationship, as I’m sure so many do. I know a few whose parents rejected and abandoned them (mine did not), and I know many whose parents are still a major part of their lives, with all the positives and negatives attached. I haven’t really begun to deal with all that her loss means, since there are so many other issues tied up, thing that need to change, so I can really get into a full healing process. Her passing is one area that I will have to begin tackling in 2013: I’m on a wait-list for a bereavement group for those who’ve lost parents. We’ll see how that goes.
As to not having full time work, starting up my own company again might be the way to go if no full time work comes my way. But, in this economy, it is finding a niche that is not full up as well as marketing what I can do properly. When I created The Brothers Grinn, no one was doing family improvisation shows: it was all adult material, in bars and colleges, with mainly drinking crowds. The improv games got old real fast for me, and I think so for others, as newer forms of improvisation theater emerged. What to do now, though, is the question. I have an idea: I just need a few people. Or a good old kick in the arse. We’ll see how this train of thought goes as well. A good internet friend has already reached out to me, suggesting we talk along these lines.
Given to me by Barbara Klein of the Late Bloomers blog (and a member of PBAU group on Facebook, a truly wonderful group of bloggers who I am happy to be associated with), the Liebster Blog award is primarily given to those who have less than 200 subscribers. The awarder feels that the blog needs to be seen by a wider audience. As I’ve mentioned with statistics, the numbers on the side of this blog do not reflect in any way the actual numbers of those who read this blog: it’s only potential readers (combining how many “followers/friends” I have on Twitter and Facebook). I average around 30 visits a day, with 17 subscribers. I’ve also mentioned that my writing this blog was never about numbers: it’s for me to heal and evolve. If others find comfort or inspiration from what I write, then good. It’s a good deed, a mitzvah.
The Liebster Blog Award comes with the following rules:
1. When you receive the award nomination, post 11 random facts about yourself and answer the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.
2. Pass the award onto 11 other blogs (while making sure you notify the blogger that they have been nominated!)
3. Write up 11 NEW questions directed towards YOUR nominees.
4. Of course, do not nominate the blog of the one who nominated your blog!
5. Paste the award picture onto your blog. (You can Google the image; there are plenty of them!)
11 Random Facts about myself:
I’m an only child; I don’t drink alcohol; I don’t smoke; I like to read; Technical explanations make my eyes glaze over; the majority of my closest friends are from High School and the first year of College; I’m not a big fan of parties or large gatherings; I know I have a lot of talent, but I also know that I’m unfocussed with it right now (that counts as two); I had given up on finding love in my life when it finally did happen; I’m a klutz.
11 Blogs I nominate and 11 New Questions:
I will have to beg off for the moment; I really want to think about this, and do it right. I WILL do this within a week: I will try to hold to that promise.
Here are the questions that Barbara would like me to answer:
1. What was your first thought this morning?
Being woken up by my SO, and cuddling, and thinking how lucky I am to have her in my life.
2. What is your favorite movie and why?
I have too many movies I like: really, honestly, can’t pick just one as my all time favorite. I don’t have a “go to” movie; there are a number I’ll watch again and again if they happen to be on TV and I run across them. “Dave” is one of them: Kevin Kline & Sigorney Weaver. Not sure why, not a laugh out loud movie. Makes me think it would have been a Jimmy Stewart movie.
3. Where would you like to live?
Right now, almost anywhere else but here. Just not on the streets, homeless.
4. What is your favorite food and why?
Meat Loaf. Just plain old comfort food.
5. Where did you spend your last holidays?
With my SO at her place for Christmas, and then she was with me here for New Years.
6. When did you start blogging? Did you know where the journey would take you?
I started blogging in January 2011 because I was bored and wanted to challenge myself with creative writing. What I’m doing right now, with this blog…no, I had no idea that I would be on this path.
7. Is there anything that you would like to change in your life?
Oh yes…so many things. That is what this blog is about.
8. What makes you smile? What makes you laugh out loud?
Small smiles right now: I’m trying to find that part of me again. I do enjoy the Animal Planet show “So Cute” for just that type of smile. Laugh out loud moments are few and far between right now. I hope to find that again.
9. How do you stay motivated?
My support group, and my drive to get out from under the dark clouds that have been hanging over me.
10. If you could be a character, who would you be? Why?
I honestly can’t think of one right now.
11. What makes you happy?
Skyping with my SO, when we can’t be together.
Posted on January 1, 2013, in Caring, Counsling, Family, Fear, Friends, Grief, Healing, Inspiration, Loneliness, Love, Meditations, Mindfulness, Prayers, Support, Therapy and tagged anxiety, award, Barbara Klein, Blog Award, blogging, bravery, caring, Christmas, compassion, concern, coping, Counsling, death, depression, emptiness, Facebook, Fear, focus, frightened, giving thanks, God, hope, Janine Ripper, jobless, Late Bloomers, Laughter, Liebster Blog Award, Loneliness, Marie Nikodem Loerzel, Muriel Jacques, patience, PBAU, Penelope Pennie James, personal facts, rededication, searching for work, strength, Sweepy Jean, Thom Brown, understanding, unempolyment. Bookmark the permalink. 18 Comments.