Open Yourself Up To Be Thankful For…Yourself

Calm ThanksWhen you arise in the morning, give thanks for the morning light, for your life and strength. Give thanks for your food, and the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies with yourself.”

 ~Tecumseh Shawnee Chief, Native American Warrior, 1768-1813

You have blessed me with many gifts, God, but I know it is my task to realize them. May I never underestimate my potential; may I never lose hope. May I find the strength to strive for better, the courage to be different, the energy to give all that I have to offer. Help me, God, to live up to all the goodness that resides within me. Fill me with the humility to learn from others and with the confidence to trust my own instincts. Thank You, God, for the power to grow. Amen.” ~Naomi Levy from Talking To God (c)

One of the hardest things  I am going through is letting the positive words that others bestow upon me sink in. That, and opening myself to accept the positive things that I know I am and can do. I hear the words, or think/write them down about myself, but they get deflected by this harsh shell I’ve erected around my heart, my inner being, and sometimes my intellect. It’s more up there, in my head,  then living throughout me, and this is the point: I’m making myself miserable in the process. In doing this, I’m also causing pain in those who love and care for me: they know that any breakthrough will come from me, about me, and they know (and I know) they can’t “save me” from these negative feelings. Only I really can do that, and I truly do want to start feeling better. I know it takes time. I have to learn to be more patient, and have faith it will happen.

I know it’s up to me to believe, wholly, in myself again. Not just from what people say about me via this blog or through my support connections, but from deep inside of myself. It is what I want, and need.

I’ve written, and continue to write, in a personal journal all the things I AM thankful about; this list is one of my daily readings, and I add to it as things open themselves to me, or as I accept them (as little as I sometimes do, I still acknowledge a lot). I have my needs, my “what I am”, “What I have,” and “what I try to be” in my life… and a new list of “what I feel I deserve”, which derives from an emotional outpouring with my SO, who, honestly, heads my list of what I am thankful to have in my life.

Be good to yourself. I know I’m going to try.

Advertisements

About StuHN

I am a creative individual with many areas of passion: Professional Storyteller; NYS Certified Drama Specialist/Educator; Professional Development Coordinator & Facilitator; Workshop Leader; sometime Puppeteer; Playwright; Director; Performer; Teaching Artist; and sometimes more.

Posted on December 18, 2012, in Caring, Counsling, Family, Friends, Healing, Inspiration, Love, Meditations, Mindfulness, Prayers, Spiritual, Support, Therapy and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. I am very proud of you for getting to where you are today! You are opening up doors you’ve never opened and you’re walking through them! God will help you to find the real you.

  2. Thanks Sam. You’re the #2 slot. I just am having so much trouble accepting any of it. We both need I need a break in a certain area so I can really start to move along.

  3. As you continue to share your writings here, I can see you are making progress in knowing what you need, and now knowing how you need to accept it. My prayers are with and for you daily.

  1. Pingback: Positive Steps « The Opening of Doors

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: