I found out this past week that I was given this blog award THREE times…and I can’t even begin to tell you how humbling that is. First I found out from Muriel Jacques, who writes the blog A French Yummy Mummy in London; I was then informed, via a comment left on one of my posts, that Roy A. Ackerman, who writes Cerebrations was giving this to me as well; on top of that, I missed that I had been extended this from a third person, actually before Muriel’s: Thom Brown, who writes To Gyre and Gambol. All three are worthy blogs to read, and all three are very, very different. If I have missed anyone else extending me this honor, please forgive me: my head is not where it should be. No slight is intended.
Getting any award, of course, was not an intent of what I am trying to accomplish with this blog: it is a journal of my feelings, trying to climb out of the depression, grief over the loss of my mother, and the anxiety I have been plunged into; a way to reconnect with the better parts of myself, to try to find a balance of coping, resilience, be more appreciative and aware of the good that I have and that is around me, and have faith and caring for myself. In doing so, it is my way of trying to come back to life, for myself and those who love and care about me.
It has also been a journey I never thought I’d take: one more spiritual, turning to God in prayers, and taking it into myself that this is not something I am doing just because I’m in (as has been said to me) “crisis mode”. As I’ve mentioned in past postings, I was never brought up in a very religious way. I went to Hebrew school only because I had to; same with going through with my Bar Mitzvah. I never connected with any of the material as a child, and once I went through the ceremony, I never really went back to the synagogue. I’ve questioned others who have (or had) faith and belief over the years. I went to a variety of services in a number of different faiths (mainly to support girl friends at those time periods), but I never found anything that called to me or provided me with even a glimmer of connection.
I do not intend to slide back into some of my old ways. Things are opening up, in small ways, and I want them to continue.
As for this blog being inspiring, enough that three different people have passed this on to me? First, again, thank you. I do hope that the small readership I do have (don’t let the numbers on side bar fool you: I average about 40 people reading this blog daily; best day was in the mid 80’s. WordPress adds people who “follow” me on twitter and other things to bolster the numbers…silly, really. I have fifteen people who subscribe to this blog; the rest “find me” from FB, or other posting social networks). I have heard from people in the comments and in some private messages that this has been inspiring for them, and for some heartbreaking as well, as I pour out how I’m feeling. I’ve been called brave for doing this, and I do know that the Rabbi who started me on this path has been proud not only of the content but that I have kept this up, that I am doing what I can to move forward, that I am doing all I can to not remain in the beaten up state I’ve done to myself, or experienced. I also know others are proud of me, Lisa, Sam, and the many others who love and care about me. I am thankful for all of them. THEY inspire me, to continue on this path.
With all these blog awards, there are some things that you are asked to do. In this case, I have to give you seven words, expressions or sentences that I like, as well as revealing seven little-known facts about me. Then, nominate 7 bloggers for the Inspiring Award, and it will be their turn to pass it on…
I’ll do the seven blogs first, as this is the hardest: I’m so off the beaten path of reading much anymore, as I’ve retreated into my head so much, but I will do what I can here, and in no particular order:
Seven words or expressions that I like:
Imagine; Give Peace A Chance; I Love you; And now for something completely different; God; You’ve Got A Friend; Unreal.
Seven Little Known Facts About Me:
- I really surprised MYSELF that I put God in the above (seven words I like). It felt right…so, new fact about me.
- I go to Starbucks because it’s usually comfortable.
- I am addicted to “The Big Bang Theory”…probably laugh at that more than any other show on TV now.
- I am more introverted than extroverted.
- I really loved Paris….been way too long since I’ve been.
- I think most modern comedic movies just…aren’t all that funny.
- I used to be much hairier.
Posted on December 17, 2012, in Caring, Counsling, Family, Fear, Friends, Grief, Healing, Inspiration, Loneliness, Love, Meditations, Mindfulness, Prayers, Spiritual, Support, Therapy, Uncategorized and tagged anxiety, Blog Award, bravery, caring, compassion, concern, coping, depression, focus, giving thanks, God, hope, Inspirational Blog Award, Inspiring, jobless, love, mental health, patience, rededication, strength, Talking to God, understanding. Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.