Substitution

“When I am feeling self-pity, God, help me to see beyond myself. When I am feeling despair, restore me to hope. When I shut people out, help me to believe in the healing power of companionship. Remind me that I am not alone, that I am needed, that I am heard, that I am loved. And that You are with me, now and always. Amen.” ~ from Talking to God, (c) Naomi Levy
 

SubTeachDismissal

But not the bell, not the day, but the person

Disregarded, not to be held to any accord

or accountable; disrespected by many

Young and “professional” alike

Unprofessionally thinking, lacking in care

That a body fills a vacancy, but often little more than that.

A blank, an unknown, a mass that fills a space.

No, not all do this…many understand there is a person standing there

With a brain, a care, a willingness, something to share

But, in the daily scheme, this comes and goes, and means little

Until the main stay returns.

Have you substituted for something else in someone’s life?

Not a job, but a life situation?

The other had a need, a use, and you filled it for that moment in time

The the thing you’ve substituted for returns

And then you’re that replaceable thing

A thing.

Where does my strength and belief in myself go then?

When does allowing someone’s  insensitivity remain just that

And not eat away at my own self worth?

How do I stop it from consuming me?

 
 
This was just a not very good day so far, and I’m trying to work out the kinks that have invaded my spirit. It’s time for meditation, some prayer, and a chance to make the rest of the day a better one.
Thank you to my friends. Thank you to the ones I love. Thank you to those who are trying their best to open my heart and mind to a greater power. Thank you for the support, the care. I need to renew my spirit, and you are all doing the best you can to help me in that way, as I am trying to do my best.
 
Thank you.
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About StuHN

I am a creative individual with many areas of passion: Professional Storyteller; NYS Certified Drama Specialist/Educator; Professional Development Coordinator & Facilitator; Workshop Leader; sometime Puppeteer; Playwright; Director; Performer; Teaching Artist; and sometimes more.

Posted on November 30, 2012, in Caring, Fear, Friends, Grief, Healing, Inspiration, Loneliness, Meditations, Mindfulness, Prayers, Spiritual, Support and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. There’s an old expression… Do you know what’s worse than hate? Indifference!

  2. Yes, I have been there – dismissed. You poignantly express the pain of that. I have been reading through this blog. Thank you for being so open and honest about your grief and for the beautiful prayers you include. God bless you as you continue your journey.

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